Queer Content Censorship: The Kids Are Watching TikTok Privacy Fail

Back in September 2020, I posted a video to TikTok that I intentionally marked as private. This video had sat quietly in my account for years, gathering only 14 views and a single like. Fast forward to July 2025, when TikTok inexplicably pushed this video to the For You page (FYP). In a matter of hours, it garnered 883 views, 198 likes, two comments, four shares, and two bookmarks.

And one of the comments came from a child.

You might wonder, “Why does that matter?” Here’s why: Not only had I set this video to private, but it was also a stitch of me reacting (or more accurately, not reacting) to someone else’s inappropriate jokes. It was a silly video that didn’t represent my public-facing content. I looked completely different from the way I present myself now.

Child's comment on my private TikTok video from 2020 with the child's 2020 backdated comment.

However, the real issue wasn’t the content of the video, but rather that an underage user had left a comment on it. TikTok swiftly removed the account after I reported it, confirming that the user was, in fact, underage. The twist here?

The child’s comment was backdated to the day I originally posted the video in 2020, which was against TikTok’s rules since users must be at least 13 to use the platform. This meant that either TikTok was deeply embedding itself into private content, or that the child had been on the platform far younger than they were allowed. 

Either way, the situation felt invasive.

It's More Than TikTok Privacy

Native TikTok analytics for a private video created in 2020. I should not be able to access native TikTok analytics from 5 years ago.

At the core of this issue was the realization that TikTok had access to private content that I didn’t want on the For You Feed. A video I hadn’t touched in years suddenly went public and was engaged with by an underage user. I could have dismissed it, chalking it up to the chaos of TikTok’s algorithms. But that’s not where this story ends. 

This incident stung because, like many others, I know what it’s like to grow up too fast in a world that isn’t kind to you. I was a kid who faced judgment for my feelings. For believing men were “cool,” but it was women I could imagine devoting my life to. The world told me I was wrong, perverted even. But the kids? They are different.

I used to teach elementary school, and I’m a mother; I know the power children hold. Kids soak up the world around them, and that world will shape them. This is why the idea that a child had access to my private content, and that it could be presented to them as an innocent “stitch” from years ago, felt like a wild invasion that sent a loud message: we will only show the parts of you that we want, and there’s nothing you can do about it. 

Children are being taught everything by the world around them, and that includes harmful or incomplete information.

Queer Content Censorship is Harmful to the LGBTQ+ Community

Underage commenter's profile I reported on July 6, 2025 at 7:09pm

The core of this issue lies not just in TikTok’s algorithm, but in how we approach education about sexuality, gender, and identity. Growing up, I didn’t have the resources, the teachers, or even the language to explain what I was feeling. Anti sodomy laws were in place until I was 17, and the word “lesbian” was still considered a mental disorder by the APA, barely a decade before I was born. My parents didn’t have the tools to help me, and it took me years to build my understanding of who I was.

What happens when children struggling with their identity don’t have accurate or healthy information about who they are? They go searching for answers in the wrong places. My father is a straight cis man and had no context or support for understanding a queer daughter. The reality is that so many children like me are trying to make sense of their feelings and are left without the right resources to help them build their identities with confidence and self-love.

TikTok confirmed the underage user, but it wasn't the user I reported.

This lack of education is a deliberate system of control. If information about gender, sexuality, and queerness were made universally accessible without stigma, fear, or misinformation, the world would be a far more inclusive place. Children would be able to learn about themselves in a world that affirms their identities, rather than one that tells them they’re wrong for being who they are.

The Power of Continuing the Fight for Visibility and Education

This incident wasn’t just about TikTok. It was about the deep need for visibility and access to inclusive education in a world where people are still gatekeeping information to preserve harmful stereotypes. I will continue to show up on these platforms because the children deserve to see and hear people like them. They need to know that the world doesn’t have to be a hostile place.

And TikTok will likely continue to suppress and flag my content, but I won’t stop sharing the truth. This is about ensuring that the next generation doesn’t have to fight the same battles. That they have the tools to grow into themselves without shame. Our children need to see that the world can be full of joy and love when we make space for everyone, when we stop punishing them for simply being who they are.

So, no matter how much TikTok continues to “sandwich” my content in its algorithm, I will keep creating, I will keep showing up, and I will keep fighting for the next generation of kids who deserve better than what I had growing up.

We owe them that.